Inner Movement Mama

I'm sure you've heard the term "your inner parent" - the adult part of yourself that should ultimately take care of you, all of your feelings, all of your moods, all of your responsibilities. That's a BIG job, especially when feelings span from one end of the rainbow to the other and to-do lists seem to never ease. But, she is always there ready for your requests.

Since I'm a personal movement trainer, here's where I coin the phrase "Inner Movement Mama". Might sound a little silly, but take a few moments to think what that could mean, how it could help you.

Do you often battle with body image? Do you have guilt on the days you don't exercise? Do you wonder what days you should incorporate weight training? Do you feel anxious that you're not stretching enough? Do you wonder how much cardio you should squeeze into your week? Do you ever purge through exercise or otherwise? Do you struggle with any sort of emotional eating? Do you have a solid sense of listening to your body? Do you know the wonders and satisfaction and peace of deep breathing? Do you stay on track only to fall off after a too-strict two weeks? Do you turn to Shape/Fitness/Oxygen/Cosmopolitan/People magazines to read about the latest diet fads? Do you stare at the newest diets wondering when in the heck you'll get used to those bland tasting foods (and how in the world you won't faint from such low calories)?

Does my list of question after question above sound a bit like the tape in your head that never stops spinning when you are trying your absolute best to eat and exercise "right"?

I understand. I truly understand. And, since I've done a lot of my own work (*Oh, and I still am along with everyone else...), I've discovered a way to help me tune into my body. There are days I feel my bones and muscles and cells and spirit talking to me. I know exactly what I need. Maybe a heart-pumping step class. Maybe some flow yoga. Maybe to push and pull some dumbbells and resistance bands. Maybe rest.

And then, there are days I am stressed or anxious or exhausted. You know what I mean. Those are the days I feel like the 4-year-old girl who wants comfort, no worries, no taxes, no difficult situations! Yet, I know better than that. And, while I might be swarming with yuck feelings of anxiety, I also know that my mind knows what's best. I know that while my body might feel like stomping her feet, my mind knows how to collect some information about my physical state and lead me to where I need to go.

*Perhaps I've been teaching a lot of yoga to clients and haven't had a chance to get in some aerobic movment in a few days. While I'm feeling flexible and calm, I'm feeling a little low energy one afternoon, and my Inner Movement Mama comes in to say, "Take a long walk or a great class - it'll amp up your energy and mood once you get moving."

*Perhaps I've been subbing a lot of classes lately, and I need a break. But, it's sunny outside, and some old stuff comes up saying, "it's sunny, get some exercise". My Inner Movement Mama comes in and says, "open your door, smell the fresh air, get comfortable and grounded on your floor, breathe deeply, maybe take a nap."

*Perhaps I'm anxious with a very nervous stomach or indigestion. I'm having a hard time listening to my hunger/full signals so I maybe eat too much or not enough to sustain me through a long morning of work. My Inner Movement Mama comes in and says, "You've got hurt in your heart. Let me take care. You know you need to fuel yourself with just the right amount - You might not be able to detect hunger/full signals now, so take an objective point of view to what your body needs to thrive - give yourself a break from always having to tune into your signals 24/7. Your mind can take over here and there too. Feed yourself enough but not too much, and breathe." Hallelujah! Sometimes my common sense can actually do the work!

Next time you're a little confused about your next daily step to exercising or eating, talk to your Inner Movement Mama. I promise you she's wise and will always be there to pick you up when you fall.

Happy Weekend!

My Yoga Mat too! - ???

Have you ever thought about how everyday bumps-in-the-road affect you? Your energy? Your reactions to everything else?

Just before I taught an 11am yoga class this morning, I went into a certain Hallmark store in Midtown to buy a card for my boyfriend for our one-year dating anniversary. :)

I walked in toward the Shoebox section I love, and just before I could pick up my first card for a good laugh, a store rep, brunette with glasses, asked for my bag with my belongings: my wallet, my class notes, my planner, my iPod, my cds.

"Is this...a safety concern?" I fumbled for words because I was shocked and insulted that I couldn't shop with my belongings.

"Well, yes." She replied trying to be polite.

"I'm not comfortable giving you my bag - what if something gets stolen?" Here, I'm thinking I don't trust the Hallmark clerk strangers with my bag any more than they may trust me with their merchandise with my bag in hand.

"It'll be safe behind the counter," she offered. I reluctantly zipped my bag and handed it to her.

"I'll take your yoga mat too." My yoga mat? Did she think I had double-sided tape stuck inside my mat to roll up 18,000 anniversary, get well, birthday and condolence cards!? Dear heavens, I'm trying to get people in their bodies this morning, I'm not trying to steal a fortune of greetings from Hallmark!

Once again, I reluctantly handed over another part of me - my yoga mat.

She walked away, and I stared at a couple anniversary cards. One made me smile - something about a furry little creature telling his lover "I'd still pick you." So sweet. But, I was still uncomfortable to stripped of my belongings - in a card shop. Something just didn't feel right.

That's when I decided I'll pick up a cute $4.00 card for my fella when I stop by Crate and Barrel later today while shopping for a wedding and birthay gift. It was about time for my class - I walked back down the aisle, asked another store clerk for my bag (for which she pointed behind the counter and said, "it's right here" - umm, how does she know I'm taking the right bag?). I left.

Hallmark can argue that customers should respect their policies - to reduce crime, to keep costs down, etc. Dear Hallmark, you sell greeting cards, not diamonds. I just can't imagine what people are stealing in there to cause such a stir.

Hmmm...yes, my feathers got a little ruffled. However, I'll play by the rules, but I just don't think I can shop there as long as they're insisting on taking my yoga mat too. Quite silly! I felt disrespected, and I left. Sure, I pray people stop stealing - I also pray that we can lighten up on the greeting cards, or perhaps be reasonable in where customers keep their rights.

When I got home, I called the manager. He was nice sounding. He asked who took my bag and mat. He sounded reasonable trying to explain those who steal awfully affect the retail store's financial success. But, he also said they're extremely busy, to stop in the store next time I'm there to discuss the issue. I understand he's busy, I understand it's a difficult decision to make - to protect their goods and keep their customers happy. What a fine line to walk.

Okay, okay, okay. Beyond Hallmark and glittery cards. This irritated me just before my class, a class I subbed, a class that draws a crowd, a class that consists of many different levels of yoginis and yogis. I'd been a little nervous not knowing what that class needed, not being familiar with the "regulars" in that class, not knowing if I'd give them what they needed.

What an opportunity to be shocked at a retail store, my privacy insulted. I was definitely flustered and angry - but what a blessing to teach that class thereafter.... I told myself to let go. To be. To go with the flow. To not take everything so seriously. The class participants would get exactly what they needed - with my help but mostly with the help of something much bigger.

Translate P to T and E

Wow, I'm about to take my own advice here, except it's not really my advice but from Natalie Goldberg, author of Writing Down the Bones. Instead of justifying or explaining my lapse in contributing to my own blog, I'll write some notes Goldberg gives:

Writing Ideas and Tips from Writing Down the Bones:
*Pick up the rhythms around you.
*Breathe deeply.
*Go for the jugular. If it's scary or naked, dive right into it; it probably has lots of energy.
*Capture the oddities of your mind.
*First thoughts have tremendous energy.
*Sit down with the least expectation of yourself. Say: "I am free to write the worst junk in the world." Give yourself the space to write a lot without destination.
*If the process is good, the end will be good. You will get good writing.

These tips correlate to your body/spirit energy, too. If you're like me, the P word haunts you. Perfectionism. So, whether you're writing or dancing or brainstorming or organizing, use these tips. Go with the flow. Allow some room for the T word. Trust. And, while you're at it, get to know the E word. Enough. You are enough. You can trust your work, your ideas, your being. Your flow is enough.