.JPG)
Last time I wrote, I mentioned it might be post-December until I wrote again, and yep, I was right. I'm ready to post more often, I'm ready to get back into my groove, and I'm ready for some normalcy again. Yet, as we all know, "normalcy" still brings its challenges and joys, and our decision to find peace and humility among the chaos and delight might be the whole point (at least that's what I think).As you can see above, wedding bells are involved in the following blog post (!) along with a few other things. The engagement photo above is from mid-September, then the bridal portrait photo is from mid-November. Props to my fabulous photographer Frank Gibson and his lovely wife Wendy. What a solid team they make - http://www.frankgibsonphotography.com/ - I would recommend them a million times. (the following photos are from friends...)
(Our First Dance: "I Never Knew Love Like This Before" by Stephanie Mills - a little sparkle, a little disco, mucho romance and loads of fun!)
Our wedding on December 5 was magical. From the ceremony, to our loved ones supporting us, to the red velvet cake, and to all the dancing, Nick and I had a ball and felt the love surrounding us just as some special people told us it would happen. While I was a grateful bride for all the help and support from my family and friends, I was still an anxious bride. Not about Nick or our marriage...just about the rush of feelings and everything happening so fast. I had the heartburn to show for my not-so-lovely anxiety, and I have a new respect for brides, and my advice would be to try, try, try to take in everything. Savor every moment (and try not to worry yourself sick about everyone else!).
We headed to Puerto Rico for some R-E-S-T. We read scrumptious books, lounged by the pool, jumped in the waves, exercised at a nice little gym, ate authentic Puerto Rican food, walked to ancient ruins. My only wish was that we could have afforded another three weeks off the real world. Not to say real life is blah, but our bodies and hearts just needed a little more downtime to breathe and settle before it all started up again....
On the last night of our honeymoon, Nick received a phone call that his grandfather passed away. We headed to Los Angeles three days later for the funeral services, and while it was heartbreaking to see the pain and shock and how it's never easy, I saw a great BIG family (see the grandchildren above) supporting each other and loving each other. They definitely found some peace and joy in just being together, honoring their grandfather's spirit and legacy.
So, once we [sort of] got over the stabbing shock of City the Kitty, Nick was feeling around on our 4.5-year-old black Lab. He's always wrestling her and kissing her and taunting her, which she loves every second. He found swollen lymph nodes. So, we said, "okay, why not let the vet check her out." The next day, Nick took Chloe to the vet where they found lymph nodes in her chest, neck and hind legs swollen. The took fluid and blood from her and sent it off for testing - just like the weekend before with City the Kitty, we held onto some Hope.
We headed to Puerto Rico for some R-E-S-T. We read scrumptious books, lounged by the pool, jumped in the waves, exercised at a nice little gym, ate authentic Puerto Rican food, walked to ancient ruins. My only wish was that we could have afforded another three weeks off the real world. Not to say real life is blah, but our bodies and hearts just needed a little more downtime to breathe and settle before it all started up again....
On the last night of our honeymoon, Nick received a phone call that his grandfather passed away. We headed to Los Angeles three days later for the funeral services, and while it was heartbreaking to see the pain and shock and how it's never easy, I saw a great BIG family (see the grandchildren above) supporting each other and loving each other. They definitely found some peace and joy in just being together, honoring their grandfather's spirit and legacy.
So, Nick and I returned from L.A. on Wednesday, December 16. On the 17th, I took my 4.5-year-old kitty "City the Kitty" to the vet for her routine vaccinations - She'd also lost quite a bit of weight while we were gone, so I was concerned. Shockingly, our vet found a mass in her belly. The next day, they did exploratory surgery, removed the tumor and her spleen. I cried, I hoped, I prayed it'd be benign. This cat is my baby - and if you're a pet owner/lover, I know you understand. I got her when I (hallelujah!) finally lived alone 4.5 years ago, and she was companion, my comfort, my little furball of love.
The night before Christmas Eve, our doctor called and gave me the sad news - lymphoma, a high grade form of cancer in my kitty's body. She has anywhere from one to four months to live. We're spending lots of time with her and keeping her comfortable until she's ready to move to greener pastures (or a higher kitty condo as I'm sure she'd love to define her heaven)....
So, once we [sort of] got over the stabbing shock of City the Kitty, Nick was feeling around on our 4.5-year-old black Lab. He's always wrestling her and kissing her and taunting her, which she loves every second. He found swollen lymph nodes. So, we said, "okay, why not let the vet check her out." The next day, Nick took Chloe to the vet where they found lymph nodes in her chest, neck and hind legs swollen. The took fluid and blood from her and sent it off for testing - just like the weekend before with City the Kitty, we held onto some Hope.
Yesterday morning, as I was making peach muffins our next door neighbor Michaela gave to us, the vet called. Chloe has lymphoma. Her life expectancy is about that of City's. We are to watch both of their appetites, weight loss and energy. We are to make them comfortable and let them know we love them with all our hearts.
No, the vet doesn't think it's environmental because the kitty has only lived in this house four months - her cancer/the tumor developed several months ago. We've just got some really crappy luck. A terrible coincidence. And, yes, we will probably have our water tested regardless for peace of mind. We joke and say we have a "control" specimen, our big-orange-bear-looking dog Bowden, who's the longest living animal in our household. His lymph nodes are fine, and he appears to be healthy - always outside in this 20 degree weather barking at anything and everything {much to our neighbors' chagrin, I am sure} and loving every minute of his simple life.
I share this to find meaning for myself and maybe give someone else an ounce of peace of mind and heart. With the good can come the bad. With the joy can come the sorrow. With the carefully planned and composed can come the shock, the loss, the uncontrollable.
We all have setbacks, we all have pain, we all have challenges. Yet, we also all have light and, hopefully, oodles of joy. Through it all, it's vital we take care of ourselves. It's vital we continue connecting our bodies, minds and spirits. Individually and together as a universe.
One of my favorite Rumi poems:
Dance, when you're broken open.
Dance, if you've torn the bandages off.
Dance in the middle of the fighting.
Dance in your blood.
Dance, when you're perfectly free.
Through it all, wherever you are, especially in this new year of 2010, I hope you can stay true to yourself, continue moving your body and your heart and your mind - Yes, that means move, hope, dream and fight for joy, grace, health, strength and peace. Stay consistent with moving your body through an exercise routine or class - let your emotions express themselves physically. Open your heart to your dreams and your hopes - use a journal or another art form to put your dreams to paper. Firmly trust that something deeper is happening beyond the bittersweet, and always rejoice in your blessings.
Peace [and dancing/moving] in 2010!
No comments:
Post a Comment