This time last year, I updated my blog as one of my best friends, Jessica, slept in my apartment after I picked her up from the airport. She'd taken a red eye from Seattle, she was behind on sleep, I was awake and ready to go!
This year, I woke up at 6am thanks to my hungry kitty, but I've enjoyed making coffee, getting caught up with the the NY Times, writing an old friend, and now, I'm listening to the helicopters hover above Peachtree as the annual Peachtree Road Race begins. (I tend to opt for my favorite step class than dodging thousands of sweaty runners - each to her own.)
Jessica called me yesterday to remind me it's been one year since we've seen each other. There are days I can't believe she's been gone from Atlanta for two years. It seems like yesterday we were at The Treehouse munching on pita, cucumbers, Roma tomatoes and hummus - both of us recovering from overnights at CNN.
Everyone says that as you get older, time flies faster. "Everyone" also says that the only constant is change. And, isn't it funny how we sometimes fight change - at all costs? Sometimes, instead of breathing, relaxing, and actually moving and grooving with some changes (perhaps with a lot of prayer!), we resist, we hold our breath, we tighten our grips, we narrow our views, we restrict, we stuff, we purge, we push, we hold tightly, we clench our teeth, we fear, we fight.
It's like a pot of water. Heat it up slowly, a few tiny bubbles might fly up the surface and pop followed by a little rumble of bubbles. More bubbles flutter to the surface, but as long as there's plenty of room to "breathe" at the top, the bubbles stay contained, gurgling, rumbling, popping, growing......Then, put a lid on it. Turn up the heat. And, if you're feeling like it, add more water, fill it to the brim. Now, you've got a really stressed out pot of boiling water. Talk about pressure cooking.
You can relate this pressure cooker analogy to any sort of change or challenge. As a personal trainer, since I help people (and myself) stay in the body with the breath, let's focus on nourishment and movement.
If you cram yourself with control, it's really harder to move, to feel, to navigate, to breathe. Think about it: If you restrict yourself from enjoying a variety of foods in your diet, you might feel tense and fearful around food you don't regularly or even just occasionally enjoy. The ewwy-gewies or sticky-salties might roar at you like monsters, spilling over, hissing, daring you to gorge. You might feel like one might lead to ten. You might avoid them at all costs.
Then, whether you indulged in zero, one or ten, you might feel like you need to shutup that "feed me!" monster by exercising. Move, move, move - punch, run, swing, reach, kick, pedal, spin, jump, stomp - harder, faster, more. Don't miss a beat.
Even when I write this, just to imagine this venomous cycle, I feel like I'm going into a little tight hole. I can't move or feel, my breath stays in my throat. I'm so focused on narrowing down the options and imagining staying rigid while aiming for control, I forget that I have feelings, and I forget that I even have a world of options! I feel like the lid's on tight, a heavy hand is pressing it down, the heat is turning up, I might explode, and everyone will see!
If you allow yourself to slow down, to stay present, to aim for what feels good, to be okay with making a mistake, to be grounded but flexible, to be open but cautious, to be fearful but faithful, you might find a sense of peace among the chaos. You can enjoy a wide variety of foods: if you tend to binge on the whole tub of ice cream, instead of buying a half gallon, go occasionally enjoy a hearty scoop from Cold Stone and call it a day. If you're afraid of eating fruit because your personal trainer told you it's loaded with sugar - fire that trainer, enjoy some fruit. If you're in an overeating mode, write down a list of non-food wishes or dreams. If you find yourself cutting out more and more foods to give yourself a sense of control, take some time and maybe talk to a confidant about your stresses or non-food "weight" that bears on you.
If you are stuck in a strict workout regimen, take a week off, and delight in some other physical activities like dancing for fun, working in a garden, taking a leisurely/mindful walk, or simply rest. If you are in a workout rut, take a new class or hire a reputable trainer, move your body in a new way. If you feel down and have a hard time getting in some daily exercise, try the 10-minute rule - Move for 10 minutes, then see how you feel. I bet 9 times out of 10, you'll feel lighter, more energetic, less depressed and more hopeful.
To celebrate the Fourth of July, to celebrate the freedom that lies within you and to honor the change that will surely come your way, my wish for you is to breathe a little deeper and stand a little taller with faith, hope, strength and flexibility.
Happy Independence Day!
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